JESUS OWNED MY STUFF, SO I CAN

I'm writing for Five Minute Friday and this week's prompt is OWN.

For so many people who grew up in abusive homes, we have trouble owning things.

Not stuff so much.  In fact, many of us own a lot of stuff, often because we've been trying to fill a hole the size of the Atlantic.

But we have trouble owning our pain, our guilt, our responsibility, our dysfunction, our fears, our real identity, our lies, our messes.

Why?  Because we've had to own someone else's guilt, pain, responsibility, dysfunction, fears, lies, messes.    Why?   Because they had to own a lot of someone else's.   And so the cycle goes on.    

We don't like to own our guilt because we've been blamed for things that are not, and were not, our fault.

We don't like to own our pain because there was no one to comfort us when we first felt it.

We don't like to own our fears, because they feel so familiar and safe to us - we've lived in them for so long.  

We don't like to own our responsibilities, because we've carried too much responsibility too early, and usually alone. 

We don't like to own our mess, because it's incredibly overwhelming and it takes heart work and hard work to start cleaning it up. 

We don't like to own our lies, because they are familiar, and because the truth seems surreal and out of reach.  

We don't like to own our dysfunction in a relationship because then we'd have to face all the other stuff.

We don't even like to own our identity, the one God keeps trying to show us, because then we'd have to acknowledge the pain and fear and lies and mess.   

The Word of God is full of God asking us to own our stuff - guilt, fear, responsibility, lies, dysfunction, mess.

But He never asks us to do that alone.     He always provides the way through.    Always.   

Jesus took ownership of all of our lies, guilt, fears, dysfunction, messes.  All of it.   He carried it all on Himself.   It wasn't His own guilt and shame and mess.    His Father asked Him to carry it.   

And it crushed Him, in the garden of crushing - Gethsemane.   That's where the crushing actually began.   And He continued to carry it all the way to death itself.

https://wau.org/resources/article/jesus_agony_in_the_garden/

He didn't live His own life.  He came to show us the Father, and to take ownership of our guilt - my guilt, your guilt, my fears, your fears, my lies, your lies, my mess, your mess.   He owned it as His own.    He carried it as His own.    

For He made Him who knew no sin to be sin for us, that we might become the righteousness of God in Him.   2 Cor 5:21

Why did He do it?   For the joy set before Him.   This verse hit me hard this week. 

.............Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.   Heb 12:2

Jesus did it for the joy set before Him.   He scorned the shame He was carrying, the shame He took ownership of, and He endured the cross, for the joy of having the relationship restored.    Not His own relationship with the Father.  That was already intact.   

But He allowed His relationship with the Father to be broken so that our relationship could be restored.  

And about the ninth hour Jesus cried out with a loud voice, saying, “Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani?” that is, “My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?”   Matt 27:46

He became sin so He could restore our relationship with the Father, that relationship that was broken in the first garden.    

God imputes righteousness to us - right standing with Him - through the finished work of the cross.

But He also works righteousness in us.   That's a process.    But it can only happen as we own our own mess.   

And we have a choice, and it's a continual one.    This side of heaven, it doesn't stop.   We can stop at any point along that process, and say we've had enough of this owning business, because it hurts.     But we have a choice to feel it and face it and forgive it and move forward.    And as we do, as we surrender all the stuff we've owned by default, and roll it onto Him who has already owned it, we get free of it - finally.    

If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us.  If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.     If we say that we have not sinned, we make Him a liar, and His word is not in us.   1 John 1:8-10

There are a lot of IFS in that passage, which means we have a choice.     But we HAVE a choice because of His.   Let's own it.    Let's do OUR part, so He can do in us what He's already done for us.  

It's a choice that we're given, because He made the choice - in that garden, during the trial, in the whipping, on that cross.   At any point, He could have said, 'I've had enough' but He didn't.   What He said instead, after allowing Himself to be completely crushed and broken, was 'It is finished!'    

The Lord has brought me back here this week.  He often does.    I wrote about it quite a while ago, but I understand it more now, a lot more.   

I sought the Lord, and He heard me,

And delivered me from all my fears.

They looked to Him and were radiant,

And their faces were not ashamed.

This poor man cried out, and the Lord heard him,

And saved him out of all his troubles.  Ps 34:4-6

This week, the Lord has woken me with this song several times.    I've heard it a lot because it's one of the songs we play regularly in the car.  My girls love Mandisa.    

I listen to a lot of music so it's not hard for me to wake up with a song.   But when the Lord wakes me with the same song regularly, I take notice.   

What are You saying through this song, Lord?    

There's freedom

On the other side of

Things that keep us tied up and afraid

There's hope in every situation

No matter what you're facing everyday

But it's up to you

You get to choose

Your Father is waiting there with open arms

Oh, I know what He's saying this week.   Own it, Kath.  Face it.   Feel it.  Forgive it.  And move forward.   Once again, I'm at a roadblock in my healing journey because this stronghold that He's brought up is incredibly painful and deep and been there a long time.   And it's hard.  And I don't want to face it and feel it.   I don't.     But He said 'It's time'.   

I keep coming back to the choices He made in that garden - in the whipping, in the trial, on the road to the cross, on that cross, in that hell.    He owned it, so I can.   

And this song gets me every time I hit a roadblock.   

From heights of heaven

To darkest night

The mission of the Father's heart upon Your mind

Nothing else would stop You

Beneath the burden

You felt the weight

You held the tension of the price You'd have to pay

Nothing would stop You

Bless the One who reigns forever

Bless the One who ransomed me

From death to life there is no other

Bless the only risen King

The Lamb of glory poured out for us

At Calvary Your body broken on the cross

Nothing would stop You

The Lion storming through gates of hell

Defeated death and then You carried back from the dead

Nothing could stop You

Nothing could stop